The Council of Monsters exists for the glorification and advancement of monsters and monster culture. We will accept for membership any monster regardless of race, religion, gender, number of additional limbs or method of creation. We realize that monsters can be created by man, nature, mythology, magic, toxic spills, food additives, fires in opera houses and, in some cases, possession by evil creatures.
We do not judge the ethics of other monsters, but support them in following the laws of the places where they exist and in changing the laws where their existence is impossible. We support, financially and otherwise, the right of each monster to have its own lair and/or castle. We support laws that will allow monsters to not only marry other monsters, but also to allow them to marry hot blonde human women who fall in love with them.
We stand solidly against angry mobs with torches and pitchforks.
We still mourn the loss of Vincent Price. For Vincent Price was a man that truly understood our plight and is thus far the only human that we have allowed to sit at the table of monsters.
The most public part of the Council of Monsters is our seal of approval. This seal is presented on products that meet only the highest possible standards as well as positively presenting monsters and monster culture in a realistic way.
Products can be submitted for approval by leaving them in a graveyard on the night of a full moon in a container filled with the blood of a freshly slaughtered koala bear. Also, please include a cashier's check for (US)$500.
For more information contact [email protected]